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After they wrapped filming, Buffy and Spike went back to his dressing room to shower and change.

"That was such a fun movie," Buffy combed out her wet hair.

"It really was," Spike agreed, rubbing a towel on his hair to get excess moisture off. "The gangbang at the end was interesting. Did you enjoy working with Ripper, pet?"

"Of course I did. He's legendary, and such a nice guy too. You'd think he'd have a huge ego, but he's very giving to his fellow actors. But," she turned and smiled at Spike, "if I had my way, I'd never do a scene with anyone except you. No one can press my buttons like you do."

Spike smirked, "Thanks, luv. I feel the same way about you. I really like that Slayer character. You were so forceful and demanding, very sexy."

"You want me to take up the dominatrix duties from Cordy next time we do a foursome?" She grinned.

"That would be fun--get you all laced up in a leather bustier..." he grinned, his tongue curling up over his top lip.

Buffy giggled then groaned. "Damn, I'm so worn out. My muscles are sore."

"My poor little, delicate petal," Spike crossed over to her. He put his hands on her shoulders from behind and massaged her gently. "You work so hard, luv. You always give your scenes your all."

Buffy moved her head in circles. "Mmm, feels good."

He bent down and lightly kissed the soft skin of her throat. "Let’s get home and into the hot tub. That should help."

"Yeah, I could definitely go from some hot tubbing." Buffy smiled and looked up at him.

"I could give you a full-body, sensuous massage...Slayer," he smirked.

"Liking it more and more...you evil, soulless, extremely naughty vampire," Buffy purred.

Spike bent down and kissed her mouth lightly.


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A few days later, a bunch of them were talking in Spike's new dressing room.

The Mayor had assigned him a more luxurious room due to his rising star status; he wanted to keep his #1 guy happy.

Faith burst into the dressing room, scaring the crap out of them.

"Shit, Faith!" Spike gasped.

"Hey, guys! Have you heard?" Faith asked, waving around a magazine.

"Heard what?" Buffy asked.

"The nominees for the Adult Entertainment Awards were announced." She grinned, holding out the latest edition of the Adult Entertainment News. "Congrats, you guys have been nominated!"

Buffy squealed with joy, "Really!? Oh my God! Let me see!"

Buffy took the magazine and opened it up, quickly going to the awards announcement page. The others crowded around her to read over her shoulder.

"Spike! You're nominated all over the place!" Buffy said excitedly.

Spike's nominations: Best Single Performance, Actor - 'Indiana Jones and the Temple of Poon' and 'Buffy the Vampire Layer', Male Performer of the Year, Best Newcummer, Male, Super Stud of the Year, Best Cum Shot - 'Summer Heat' and 'Cum Camping'.

Buffy's nominations: Best Newcummer, Female, Best Single Performance, Actress - 'Buffy the Vampire Layer', Female Performer of the Year.

Xander's nominations: Best Newcummer, Male, Super Stud of the Year, Best Threesome - 'Roman Orgy 2', Unsung Swordsman.

Xander knew that Spike was more than likely going to win everything he'd been nominated for. There was a passing pang of jealousy, but winning awards really weren't important to Xander. He had a great time working on the movies. His pride in his friend's performances overrode any resentment in Xander's heart.

Spike and Buffy were nominated together for Best Onscreen Duo, Male/Female, and Best Sex Scene for 'Buffy the Vampire Layer' and 'Summer Heat'. 'Buffy the Vampire Layer' was nominated for Movie of the Year.

Their friends received some nominations too. Everyone laughed and smiled, hugging and congratulating each other.

"We totally have to celebrate," Faith said. "Since Halloween's in a few days, why don't we have a party here at the studio? It can double for a big, self-congratulatory wank party for our nominations."

They laughed and agreed that that sounded like fun.

Spike kept the info that it was also his birthday to himself. He didn't want everyone to make a fuss over him. Or feel obligated to get him something. He expected one of the few people who knew about his birthday (Buffy, Xander or Cordy) to say something, but they didn't.

'Maybe they forgot...' Spike thought, feeling a little hurt.

But he tried not to take it personally, everyone had a lot going on in their lives at the moment. Sometimes birthdays were forgotten. It was for the best, he wanted to drive back to Sunnydale that night to see his mum anyway. He felt kind of embarrassed about wanting to see him mother on his birthday, being a mamma's boy carried a stigma. He didn't inform his housemates that he planned on going to Sunnydale on Halloween night.


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The living room reeked of stale cigarette smoke and whiskey.

He sat drinking a bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 on the couch, leafing through his mail disinterestedly while he watched a Friends re-run. His dark-brown eyes were cold and indifferent, looking through, rather than at the screen. He didn't crack a smile the entire episode, though it was one of his favorites.

Life sucked.

And he was getting as numb as humanly possible.

A picture in the issue of 'Adult Playground Magazine' caught his attention; drawing his eyes like a magnet. He looked down at it, focusing his bleary, bloodshot eyes.

It was a picture (the first in a whole series of shots on the following pages) of Spike, giving the camera a sexy, suggestive smile. The title of the article alongside the picture read, 'A New Leading Man, For a New Millennium! Spike Me, baby!'

He grumbled, swiping the magazine onto the floor. Unfortunately, that action revealed his copy of 'Adult Entertainment News', which was even worse.

It read: 'Horizons Ent.' dominates awards noms. New BMOC, platinum-haired, erotic film sensation, Spike, receives most nominations of any first time nominee in 23 year history of awards!'

His eyes scanned the mention of the numerous awards that Spike had been nominated for. Rage. Red hot rage. It consumed him. There, smirking up at him from the magazine on the floor, was the reason everything was wrong--the reason for everything being fucked up.

Angel snapped.

"You son of a bitch!" he yelled at the magazine, spittle flying from his lips. He threw his bottle at the far wall. "You ruined my fucking life! Oh you're so fucking smug, aren't you?" He picked up the magazine and talked to the picture, directly. "Guess what? You won't get away with it. That's right."

Angel's life had gone downhill fast after leaving Horizons. His car had already been repossessed, he was going to lose his home next month. He went to every good porno movie studio looking for a job; they all inexplicably turned him down. Angel turned more and more to drugs to make him feel better.

"You think you're such hot shit, don't you? I'll show you who's top dog in this town...I'll show...you."

He stopped, realizing that he was having a conversation (albeit a one-sided one) with a picture. He closed his eyes tightly.

"Damn you...Damn you for doing this to me!" he growled.

He began ripping up the magazine in a frenzy, littering the floor with confetti. When he was finished, his chest was heaving. Angel dropped down to sit on the couch, looking at the mess he'd made. He put his hands over his face and sobbed loudly.

"Why is this happening to me? Why? God--I have to get my shit together--I have to do something before..."

'Before I go out to find Spike and murder him.'

The whisper in his mind frightened him in a rare lucid moment. He was getting very close to doing just that.

Angel was losing his grip on sanity.





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