Never one to refuse a lady, Spike tangled his left hand in Buffy’s hair and pulled her into a heated kiss. Moaning at the unrestrained passion coursing through her veins, the Slayer responded with equal fervour, nipping at Spike’s bottom lip until her tongue was granted access to his mouth. There was no trace of the hopeless desperation from inside the Bronze; instead, this kiss was fuelled by years of repressed longing and an undeniable need for completion. From that first fateful meeting in the alley, Buffy had met her match, her soul mate. And despite her avid denials, she knew that this progression was inevitable.
Insistently, Spike’s tongue duelled with hers, sucking rhythmically, until with a heady gasp, she gave herself over to him completely. There was no feeling in the world that could compare to this, no flavour to rival the addictive taste of Spike’s kisses. The more he gave, the hungrier she became, and Buffy’s grip tightened as something deep within her locked into place. The only thing standing between her and a lifetime of this blissful fulfilment were three simple words.
Words that without a doubt terrified her more than any vampire or demon she had ever faced.
What am I so afraid of? Buffy thought. Just tell him. It’s not like he’ll run away screaming. The curse of Buffy lovage doesn’t apply here. Spike loves me... and he’s not going to leave.
Spike’s hand slipped behind her head, and, effortlessly removing her scrunchie, he allowed the golden tresses to fall around her shoulders in waves. “Buffy, sweetheart, look at me,” he whispered, cupping her chin in his palm. Bereft of the sensation of his cool lips against hers, the Slayer whimpered in protest and slowly opened her eyes to meet his gaze. “I love you.” Deft fingers combed through her hair as the other hand cupped her cheek. “I love you.”
“Spike.” Her voice was barely a whisper as she rained a series of soft kisses against his lips. “Thank you... thank you.”
“Buffy?” Confusion flooded the vampire’s voice as he grasped her by the forearms, gently breaking their embrace as he forced her eyes to meet his. “What is it? What’s wrong?”
With a giddy smile, Buffy placed her hands on Spike’s chest. His lips curled into a corresponding grin, as through the thin cotton of his t-shirt, her touch warmed his non-beating heart. “Do you have any idea how exhausting it is always being the strong one? All those fake smiles and sacrifices? The brave faces I put on for the gang, just because I’m of the Chosen and supposed to be able to handle whatever the Hellmouth throws at me?”
Mimicking his pose, Buffy’s head tilted to the side, as unconsciously, her hands smoothed over the corded muscles of his stomach. “I’m not the same person I was before,” she said, “I’ve changed. I can feel it… and it scares the hell out of me.” A heavy sigh passed through her lips as numerous emotions danced in her eyes. “I don’t know who I am anymore, Spike—who I’m supposed to be, but… one thing I do know is when I’m with you, I don’t have to pretend anymore. No matter what, you always see straight through the crap and the lies, and the endless amounts of crazy but you don’t care. You love me anyway.”
Buffy paused and took a deep breath to steady her thundering pulse. “I don’t know how to exist here anymore, Spike. But when I’m with you—you wake me up. You make me feel things that I’ve long since buried, things that I thought weren’t real—couldn’t possibly be real, and then… God, when you’re not there...”
The air between them sparked with electricity, and Spike was keenly aware that he was panting to such a degree that if he’d actually needed the oxygen that flooded his lungs, he would have been in danger of hyperventilating. Hastily, he swallowed past the lump in his throat as the intensity of Buffy’s gaze caused a shiver to race down his spine.
Overwhelmed by the need to touch her, Spike banded his arms around her waist, rocking her against his aching erection. “I only feel alive when you look at me,” she said, shaking her head as she regarded him. “You make this life feel real, and—sorry,” she ducked her head, “I’m turning into babble-girl. I told you Buffy and words were seriously of the unmixey.”
Spike opened his mouth to respond, but was immediately silenced when she placed a finger on his lips. Garnering her courage, Buffy took that final leap of faith; her eyes never abandoning his stunned gaze as she stifled a sob.
“I love you, Spike. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner. I wanted to... I—” Sniffling, Buffy brushed a lone tear from her cheek. “I guess I was too afraid or—I don’t know—too stubborn to admit it—but I do, I... please believe me. God, Spike, I love you so much.”
So lost in her verbal outpouring, Buffy had yet to notice that her vampire was atypically silent. It was only when a look of sheer wonderment stormed his eyes that the Slayer took the time to study him. No man had ever looked at her like that before, like she was the embodiment of everything he’d ever wanted—everything he’d been denied for so long.
“Spike?” She knew she had nothing to fear, but the unmixeyness of Buffy and the ‘L’ word caused a pool of nervousness to bubble inside her. “Please, say something.”
“You sure ‘m not dreamin’?” Spike’s voice was choked with emotion as he held her tighter, afraid she would disappear. “Christ, Buffy, I never thought... I hoped, but—I never actually believed...” With an aching groan, he drew her into a fiery kiss. “Say it again,” he begged against her lips. “Please, kitten, let me hear the words.”
The uncharacteristic display of vulnerability brought a soft smile to her lips. “I love you, Spike.”
Spike froze, elated and terrified in equal measure, as without warning, his eyes flooded with joyous tears. His vision narrowed until the rest of the room disappeared, and at that moment, all else amounted to nothing. He saw nothing—knew nothing but the girl in his arms. She was his world, his reason for being, and nobody was going to take her from him again.
Slowly, he slid his hand behind her head, twining through her hair as he guided her towards his kiss. If Buffy had expected a forceful embrace, she was mistaken. With deliberate restraint, Spike teased and persuaded until she was unable to take any more. Heaving a deep sigh, Buffy opened her mouth, allowing him to delve inside and kiss her with everything he had. Even then, he remained gentle, nipping at her bottom lip and lightly massaging her tongue with his own. A slight tilt of the head changed the angle from seductive to devouring, and upon pulling away, Spike was treated to the sight of Buffy, breathless and flushed with desire.
It was intoxicating. I did that, he thought as he dove in for another kiss.
Spike was determined to worship the goddess in his arms. Through his actions, the vampire would endeavour to recreate heaven on earth and give her back a little of what was so thoughtlessly stolen. His lips abandoned the delights of her mouth to trail a line of butterfly kisses towards her ear. Running his tongue along the outer shell, he proceeded to nibble and suck at the fleshy lobe until Buffy was writhing in his arms. Reflexively, the hand at the base of her spine clenched, tense fingers digging into her soft flesh as Spike pressed her urgently against his throbbing length.
Inevitably, Buffy’s skirt bunched up around her waist as she ground herself against his confined hardness. She was certain that Spike could feel the evidence of her arousal despite the two layers of clothing that separated them, but as an exultant shiver raced down her spine, she found she was past caring. Keening, the Slayer ground herself against his rigid erection, faster, harder, increasing the pressure on her clit with each purposeful thrust of her hips. A whimper fell from Buffy’s lips as Spike’s cock moved within his jeans, twitching and pulsing in unison with her own throbbing body.
The duel sensation of the damp lace of her panties rubbing against the rough denim of Spike’s jeans felt incredible, but it wasn’t enough. Buffy longed to feel him, unobstructed, against her wet folds—to feel Spike’s hands trace the silken curves of her body; however, the sensations flooding throughout her being were too wonderful to bring to a close. The scent of her arousal permeated the air between them, and the sound of her panting sighs echoed in her ears. Buffy had never before been so turned on by kissing alone, and she was shaken by the force of emotion Spike’s lips invoked.
Spike groaned as his senses were assailed with tantalising hints of her arousal. His hands ached to wander over Buffy’s skin, to dip between her legs and feel the sopping confirmation of her desire against his fingers. Nonetheless, Buffy had said she wasn’t ready, and despite the blatancy of writhing in his lap, was yet to announce a change in the rules. Regardless of this knowledge, Spike’s hands moved of their own volition, sliding up and over her ribcage, finally coming to rest beneath the swell of her breasts. In a moment of daring, his thumbs brushed over the hard protrusions of her nipples through the thin material of her sweater, causing Buffy to moan and arch into his touch.
Reigning in his desire, Spike summoned a century’s worth of restraint and fought to get himself under control. He knew with certainty that he’d gotten this far by allowing Buffy to define the boundaries of their relationship, but the pleasure-filled whimper that passed her lips made it bloody difficult to remember to be good. Breathless and moaning, she squirmed against him, relishing the feel of his hardness pressed against her burning centre. Greedily, Buffy’s hands traced the sculpted muscles of Spike’s abdomen, before sliding up to grasp his biceps with her trembling fingers.
Captivated by the incredible sight before him, Spike groaned as Buffy’s head fell backwards, affording him the opportunity to lavish attention on her throat. Her racing pulse thrummed beneath his eager mouth, as the vampire licked and kissed along the fragrant column of her neck. Teasingly, he tickled her ear and sucked at her collarbone, causing Buffy to jerk in his arms as he bit down lightly with his blunt teeth. A breathy gasp tore from her throat and she ground herself against him faster, desperate for more of the delicious torture.
Anxious to feel his bare skin beneath her touch, Buffy pushed her hands beneath Spike’s T-shirt and scraped her fingernails across his chest. Her questing digits pinched and rolled his nipples, causing Spike to thrust against her as a deep groan tore from his throat. The sound caused a corresponding moan to fall from Buffy’s lips and her hands reached for his zipper, clawing desperately at the top button in an effort to free his imprisoned length.
Surprise was written all over her face when Spike took hold of her scrabbling hands, effectively preventing the Slayer from reaching her goal. “Buffy, love, hang on a sec,” he said, lacing her fingers with his and stilling her movement.
“Wha—Why?” she asked, her voice small and confused, “I thought...” Hurt flashed in her eyes and Spike’s undead heart ached at the sight. “Don’t you want me?”
Spike baulked. “Are you barmy? Of course I bloody well want you,” he replied, squeezing her hands in reassurance. “Never doubt how I feel ‘bout you, love... But the thing is... and I’m likely to bust a nut for even suggestin’ this, but—” A deep sigh shuddered through his lips as he met Buffy’s confused gaze. “I promised myself I’d do right by you, sweetling, an’ I meant it. I’ll be damned all over again if we’re gonna have our first time on a lumpy old couch. I don’t just wanna shag you, pet,” he said, smiling when a flush appeared on her cheeks. “I want to lay you down on my bed and worship every inch of your luscious body. I want to make love to you the way you deserve.”
Buffy’s eyes searched his gaze, seeing the truth of his words. With a gentle smile, she brushed a fleeting kiss against his lips, however, a small frown marred her features when she glanced down at his erection straining against the seam of his zipper. “That looks painful,” she said, immediately wincing at her naivety when a slow, sexy smirk formed on Spike’s lips.
“Well yeah,” he replied, running his tongue over his teeth. “But if I let that beast out, it’s a bugger to get the bloody thing back under control. Got a mind of its own, it has. ‘Specially when it’s around you, love.” Buffy couldn’t help the chuckle that bubbled from her throat, and she sighed as Spike slipped his hands up her arms and caressed his way down to her waist. “Don’t you go frettin’ that pretty blonde head ‘bout me, love. Let me take care of you, yeah? Just relax and I’ll show you what happens when you put yourself in the hands of a real master vampire.”
Spike returned his mouth to her fluttering pulse point, and a ragged moan slipped from Buffy’s throat when once again, he slid his hands over her breasts. Emboldened by her response, Spike proceeded to massage the fleshy mounds as his talented fingers found her aching nubs. Each tweak of her nipples caused a corresponding tug in her womb, and absent-mindedly, Buffy worried her bottom lip between her teeth, causing tiny drops of blood to mar the swollen flesh. The vampire’s nostrils flared at the scent of her potent essence, and leaning down, he swiped his tongue over her abused lip.
Spike was sure that if Buffy kept up her ceaseless movements he would likely embarrass himself by coming in his jeans. However, he had never done so before, and he sure as hell didn’t plan on starting now.
Unfortunately, Buffy was making it damned hard.
Bloody hell.
He was hard, all right. Ignoring the fact that he was sporting an erection that could pound nails, Spike dedicated himself to giving Buffy what she needed. Focusing on her pleasure, Spike grinned as she bucked and mewled against his cock, unashamedly writhing in his arms. Buffy’s arousal overwhelmed his senses and he could tell she was swiftly approaching orgasm. Determined to push her over the edge, Spike nipped at her ear, tickling her neck with his cool breath. His hands fell to her waist as he ground his erection against her burning core, seeking to bury himself inside her welcoming body.
Soon.
At that moment, Spike wanted nothing more than to rip her sodden panties off and shag her senseless, but he was certain that if he controlled his baser impulses this could become something more. Something glorious. Something beyond either of their wildest imaginings.
Her potent blood beckoned him like a siren’s call, and Spike allowed his canines to drop without fully shifting into his vampiric visage. Cautiously, he scratched his fangs along the vulnerable skin of Buffy’s neck, raising a series of identical welts. Crimson beads welled in the shallow cuts, and Spike laved the area with his tongue. Soothing and relishing his first taste of Slayer blood since that New York subway. The intoxicating fluid stimulated his taste buds, and Spike’s demon clamoured for more, screaming at him to claim its chosen mate. His self-control wavered when Buffy’s fingers tightened in his hair, holding him against her neck as she unconditionally offered him the sweet nectar of her life source.
Not yet, mate, he thought as his raspy tongue sent shivers racing throughout Buffy’s body. She doesn’t know what it means. The girl’s not ready to make that commitment.
Spike’s mind was still spinning from Buffy’s confession of love, and he wasn’t about to rush her into a decision of such unparalleled importance. His heart held no doubts. As far as Spike was concerned, Buffy was all he’d ever want. Nonetheless, he wouldn’t impose immortality on her in the heat of the moment. That was a discussion that could wait for now. But one day he would make their bond official. Make it forever.
Abandoning the temptation of her neck, Spike took Buffy’s mouth in a searing kiss. “Does that feel good pet?” he asked, finally breaking the embrace. “Do you like what I do to you?”
Divested of coherent speech, Buffy was helpless to do anything other than nod and pant in response. Dropping a tender kiss against the corner of her mouth, Spike nibbled his way across Buffy’s jaw line until he reached the sensitive skin behind her ear.
“You feel so good in my arms,” he murmured, nipping at the fleshy lobe. “This is where you belong, love. Never gonna let you go, my sweet slayer.” Blowing lightly, he whispered in her ear and delighted at the tremor that wracked her over-sensitised body. “You’re mine, Buffy, as much as I am yours.”
Shamelessly, he crooned in her ear and ground his erection against her needy centre, determined to send her over the edge. “So bloody beautiful,” he said, threading his fingers through her hair. “I want to watch you come, sweetheart. Want to hear you scream my name as you writhe in my lap. You’re drivin’ me outta my soddin’ mind here... Makin’ my cock so hard. Want to bury myself inside you, pet. Want to thrust into your juicy quim and feel you squeezin’ me... You’re wet for me, aren’t you? Gonna burn me to ashes, you will... My darling girl.”
Erratically, Spike fought to drag unneeded air into his long dead lungs. Buffy was going wild in his arms and determinedly, he forced down his own need for gratification.
“Spike!” The cry escaped from her throat as a breathy pant. Scratchy and thick, the Slayer barely recognised her own voice as her body spiralled uncontrollably towards release. She couldn’t think beyond her need for completion, couldn’t focus beyond the sensation of Spike’s lips sucking her tender skin between his teeth. The riotous emotions within her were all consuming, and it was only the constant reassurance of his deep baritone that kept her grounded to reality.
“So fucking beautiful,” he whispered against her throat as he favoured her with a languorous lick of his raspy tongue. “Let go, sweetheart, I’m here. Spike’s got you.”
“Keep talking,” she said, moaning softly and urging him on with a heated gasp. “Don’t stop... Oh god, Spike, say my name—talk to me. So close... so... Oh!”
“Buffy, Buffy, Buffy... love you so much. Just you. Only ever you. Come for me, baby. Come for your man.”
Spike’s babbled words fuelled the inferno within her, and Buffy hissed in pleasure as liquid fire raced through her veins. Reaching forward, she grabbed his head in her hands, kissing him with enthusiasm as she thrust her tongue into his mouth. Spike’s determined hands traversed her body and grasped Buffy’s hips as he encouraged her movements against his imprisoned length. Helplessly, Spike bucked against her centre, until with a groan, Buffy stiffened, shuddering and trembling in his arms as her orgasm rushed through her body.
The metallic taste of blood filled Spike’s mouth, and he realised that in his haste to prevent spilling himself inside his jeans, he’d accidentally bitten into his own bottom lip. The pain acted as a suitable diversion as he hauled Buffy towards him, swallowing down her screams of release as he wrapped his arms around her back and waited for her to ride it out. Incredibly, his girl refused to baulk at the unfamiliar sensation, and with matching fervour, she moaned and returned his bloodied kiss. Finally, Buffy’s sated body calmed, and Spike uttered a harsh groan as the last trace of tension left her body and she collapsed against his chest, quivering in his arms.
“Oh god,” she murmured, as her racing pulse fought to return to normality. “Oh god, Spike.” Panting, she huddled bonelessly in his embrace, marvelling at the pleasurable aftershocks that shivered down her spine. “That was—I’ve never...” Pulling away, she suddenly rose to meet his gaze. “What about you?” she asked, indicating his still prominent erection. “You didn’t... Do you want me to—”
Willing his body to relax, Spike chuckled and draped his forearm over his eyes. “Don’ worry ‘bout it, love. You can owe me one, yeah?” A devilish smirk curled his lips, as he met her gaze. “An’ you can bet your delectable little arse that I plan to collect.”
“Is that a threat?” Buffy asked, leaning forward to drop a lingering kiss against his cheek.
“No, kitten,” he replied, threading both hands through her hair and drawing her towards his mouth. “That’s a promise.”
Foreheads resting together, their lips brushed in a feather-light caress.
“I love you, Spike,” Buffy whispered against his lips. “I don’t know what I’d do if...” Her words trailed off as a shudder raced down her spine and her eyes fluttered shut.
“I’m not goin’ anywhere, sweetheart,” Spike replied, nuzzling at her neck. “I love you, an’ I’m here to stay. As long as you want me, I’ll be right by your side.”
“How does forever sound?” Buffy asked, running her hands over Spike’s stomach as she pressed herself against him. “Does forever work for you?”
Anxiety constricted his throat, as she eerily voiced his undisclosed thoughts. Sighing, Spike wrapped his right arm around Buffy’s waist, drawing her closer.
“You don’ know what you’re askin’ of me,” he said, brushing her hair back behind her ear.
Abandoning the delights of his toned abdomen, Buffy reached up to cup his face. “Give me a little credit, huh? I may not be all with the slayer book smarts, but on occasion, I do actually listen when Giles speaks. I know what a claim is. And yeah, I know exactly what I’m asking.”
“Well let’s hear it then, kitten,” he said, intrigued by the unexpected turn of events. “What is it you reckon to know ‘bout claims?”
Buffy rolled her eyes at the sarcastic undertones in Spike’s voice, placing her hands on his shoulders. “Bite’s happen. Blood is swapped. We say the magic words and hey, presto! Claimage.”
“Buffy, this is serious—”
“I know. Look at me. I’m serious girl. I’m all with the seriousness over here.”
“Forever’s longer than it sounds, love.” The solemn note in his voice surprised her, and she quickly sobered when she met his nervous eyes. “I’ll be buggered if I can wrap my head ‘round the idea, an’ I’ve been around a damned sight longer than you have.” Spike expelled a harsh breath and his voice dropped to a low whisper, disclosing his uncharacteristic insecurity. “I just don’t wanna be somethin’ you regret. I couldn’ bloody stand it if you weren’t sure an’ ended up hatin’ me for the rest of eternity.”
A gentle smile curled Buffy’s lips as she saw the future unfold before her. Fighting, loving—simply living with Spike by her side. Now that she had opened her heart and mind to the possibility of a future, Buffy knew she could never let him go. The existence of vampiric claims was one of the few lessons of slayer training that she’d bothered to retain, and if there was a chance that she didn’t have to give him up, Buffy would grasp it with both hands and hold on for dear life.
However long said life may be.
“I think the real issue here, is whether you could put up with me for the rest of eternity,” she said, determined to dispel his fears. “I seem to remember a certain vamp saying I was stubborn and frustrating.”
A rich chuckle rumbled from Spike’s throat as he tilted his head to the side. “Yeah, an’ if I recall correctly, he also mentioned lovin’ you enough to turn his back on his entire soddin’ existence,” he replied. “I’m not letting you go, Buffy. Not now that I finally have you. An’ I swear, if it’s what you really want, then one day I’ll make you mine in blood an’ not just in word.” His tone was grave as he met her eyes. “Nobody’s gonna tear us apart.”
Spike watched as a torrent of emotion warred behind Buffy’s gaze. Her eyebrows knitted together to form a tight frown, and upon reaching her unknown conclusion, a look of determination washed over the Slayer’s features. Curious, the vampire opened his mouth to speak, but reconsidered when Buffy shivered in his arms. Reaching across he picked up his discarded duster from the arm of the couch and wrapped it around her shoulders, holding her tightly as he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead.
“So, where do we go from here, love?”
He was watching her with such undisguised affection that Buffy felt tears well in her eyes. Swallowing hard, she curled her fingers around the soft material of Spike’s t-shirt and offered him a reassuring smile.
“Hold me?”
At the hint of nervousness that tainted her voice, Spike swore to banish her insecurity if it was the last thing he ever did. Inexplicably, her eyes were wide, fearful of rejection, as they implored him to stay. How was it possible that this incredible woman had no idea of the power she held over him? Tucking her hair behind her ear, Spike brushed his thumb against Buffy’s cheek.
“Never could say no to you Summers’ women,” he said, crushing his lips against hers in a kiss that stole her breath away. A kiss flavoured with the promise of tomorrow. “Not about to start now.”
As daybreak crept over the horizon, thick drapes protected the sleeping forms of the Slayer and her vampire protector. Laid out on the couch, with Buffy’s head pillowed on his bicep, the two lovers slept safe in the knowledge that the greatest battle was won. With strength gained through love, they’d reached the other side, and there would be no fearing what lay ahead. The tempest of despair was behind them, but a new storm was brewing. Unavoidably, the encroaching dawn would bring forth a thunderous demand for answers and vindication.
Nevertheless, when those dark clouds parted they would walk through hand in hand.
United.
Together.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Here it is folks, the idea that set up home in my head, months before I worked up the nerve to put finger to keyboard. This idea has been screaming at me since long before I made my smutty debut and I’m so glad to have finally written it down. This is my baby... my own personal gripe fic, and my attempt to right the Spike bashing wrongness of series six!
Beta’d by Dawnof me
Beta’d by Dawnof me
Chapter End Notes:
*Sniffle* Okay so that's the final chapter. I've really enjoyed writing this one though and I've left it open for an epilogue/sequel. I'm dying to write a scoobie showdown. *grins*