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Author's Chapter Notes:
To all those who reviewed and didn't get a response: Something is screwy with TSR. I try to respond to your reviews, but I get the message: Not your story. It's drivin me nuts. Some reviews I can reply to, and some I can't, for some unknown reason. I'd love to reply to your thoughtful reviews, if only I could. I appreciate all of you taking the time to let me know you liked what I wrote *hugs*

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William and Buffy got dressed after their shower. She opted to put on one of his white button-up dress shirts instead of putting her own shirt from yesterday back on. His shirt was long enough to cover her naughty bits, and she outright refused to go hunting through Cecily's walk-in closet for anything to wear. With the exception of William, she didn't want anything that had touched her cousin to touch her skin.

They had a pizza delivered for lunch (Buffy's suggestion), and then cleaned up the study after the previous night's revelry. After that, William told her that he had important calls to make.

Buffy rambled around the mansion for awhile, wondering if William might ask her to move in someday. Could she really get that lucky -- to finally have the man she'd loved for years, and get to live in a luxurious mansion to boot? She didn't want to get her hopes up too high, but it seemed like that could indeed be her future.

Most of the decor was obviously Cecily's taste. Buffy's eyes narrowed at all the pictures of Cecily scattered throughout the house. The bitch seemed to think of herself as gorgeous, but Buffy thought her cousin was maybe 'okay' looking, but nothin' to write home about. Cecily definitely wasn't as hot as she appeared to believe she was. An individual's personality affected how others saw them, so to Buffy, Cecily looked like an extra from the 'Thriller' video.

There was even a big oil painting of Cecily hanging in the living room. It was one of those portraits like you'd see in a horror movie, where the eyes would follow the occupants of the room. Buffy wanted to take it out to the driveway and back her car over it a few dozen times.

Buffy wondered how Cecily was going to react to her husband's news. Not only was she going to be losing the 'wealth and prestige' that went with the Giles name, but she was getting dumped for another woman, her own cousin. Family reunions were going to be interesting in the years to come.

She turned on the TV to watch some soap operas to pass the time -- not that she needed the intrigue and romance of soaps, her life was a lot like one.


An hour later, Buffy sat up and smiled when William came into the living room.

"Sorry it took me so long, love."

"That's okay, I kept myself amused. Well, how did the calls go?"

He smiled back at her, making her relax a bit. She'd been sure that something would go wrong.

"The wheels are in motion."

"Did you call her?"

"No, not yet."

"Oh." Buffy thought maybe he was having second thoughts, or maybe that he just wasn't capable of standing up to Cecily.

William came over to the couch and sat next to her. He took her hand and kissed the back of it. "I will, Buffy. I just had to make other calls first. I'm not backing out, don't think that for a moment."

She smiled sheepishly. "Okay... I did get nervous there for a second."

"Would you like to listen in on the phone call? I want you to know exactly what I tell her."

"William, I trust you. I'm sorry if I --"

He shook his head. "It's not a matter of trust, I just thought you'd like to hear what I say and how she reacts."

"Well... I guess I'd like to sit in on the convo if you really don't mind. I don't want you to feel like my eyes are boring into you while you're talking."

William gave her a peck on the lips. "I like your eyes boring into me. One thing that I think would be prudent though... I'll keep the fact that I'm leaving her for you a secret." He saw her mouth turn down slightly at the corners, and quickly went on to explain, "Not because I've changed my mind, I still love you with all of my heart and soul, and want for us to be together. It's just that the divorce will go through more quickly if she doesn't have grounds to drag it out, such as you and I having an affair. And I don't want her saying horrid things about you to your family or anyone who will listen."

Buffy reluctantly nodded. "Yeah, I can understand that. So, that means that we have to hide the fact that we're in love? For how long?"

"It shouldn't be more than a few months... It will be painful for me too, Buffy. I want to shout my love for you from the rooftops."

"You know, I don't give a shit what Cecily says about me. My family knows how she is, virtually nobody likes her, except for one or two snooty relatives who are exactly like her. But I get the other reason, about the divorce going smoother if she doesn't know about us. And I definitely want that to be done with as soon as possible."

"After the divorce goes through, I want you to move in with me immediately." William looked at her with hope in his eyes, blushing slightly. "Um, that is if you want to, of course."

She smiled. "I'd love to. But don't you think it's a little early to be talking about that kind of stuff?" She felt bad for making him pout. "I mean, I really do want to live with you, that crossed my mind while I was waiting for you. But we need to actually go on a real date before we have a spat about how to squeeze a tube of toothpaste."

"Personally, I fancy the toothpaste that comes in pumps," he joked.

She playfully smacked his leg. "You know what I mean."

"I do. And we can take things as slowly or quickly as you feel most comfortable. For instance, if you'd rather not meet clandestinely for..."

"Booty calls?" Buffy laughed.

"Sounds so tawdry... I don't want to drag you down into any --"

"You wouldn't be 'dragging me down', William. I love you, and I'll be with you whenever and wherever I can. It might be a lot of fun meeting in out of the way places, maybe wearing crazy disguises."

They giggled, picturing each other wearing sunglasses and wigs.

"But," Buffy put her arms around his neck, "as soon as you're free of the Wicked Witch of the West, I want us to go public. Deal?"

William nodded and kissed her. "Deal."

"My cousin isn't a delight normally, I can just imagine how ballistic she's going to go when you say you're leaving her."

"Can I fake my own death?" William said, half-kidding. He wasn't looking forward to that conversation either, but he was determined to do it. Telling Cecily to go fuck herself was long overdue.

"I think you should know how obsessed she is with your money. Cecily told me lots of times about how..." Buffy bit her lip, not wanting to hurt him.

"What?" William prodded.

"I could never tell you this before because I thought it would hurt you too much to hear it, but... she said that the only things she liked about you were your money, and that you were... weak-minded, and easily manipulated."

William's eyes narrowed, he clenched his jaw and looked away. Unfortunately, he looked right at the portrait of Cecily. Her cold brown eyes and self-satisfied smile mocking him even in painted form.

Buffy rubbed his leg. "I shouldn't have told you that... I'm sorry."

"No, it's good that you told me." He shot daggers at the portrait with his eyes. "Wish you would have told me sooner. I suspected that was what she thought of me, but wouldn't let myself believe it. I was very good at deluding myself, in case you hadn't noticed." He ran a shaky hand through his hair and leaned back on the sofa. "Two bloody years of my life... wasted on that... woman."

Buffy was grateful that he didn't look overcome with sadness, like she'd imagined him looking when he heard his wife's real opinion of him. He did look angry though -- angrier than she had ever seen him. "Are you mad at me for not telling you?" Buffy asked timidly.

William turned to her, his expression softening and his eyes regaining some of their warmth. "No, I'm not mad at you. My wrath is aimed squarely at that bitch of a soon-to-be ex of mine." He stood up and offered her his hand, "Shall we?"


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


They went into the study, both grinning despite being nervous about Cecily's reaction. There were a lot of great memories in this room after just one night.

Buffy sat on the divan. William preferred to stand, wanting to be on his feet to feel stronger. He'd been such a jellyfish throughout his marriage, letting Cecily walk all over him, and it wasn't easy to finally stand up for himself. Bad habits were hard to break. But he did feel different now, as if a part of himself had finally awakened from a long sleep. He felt stronger, more confident and sure of himself. He had Buffy to thank for opening his eyes, and making him feel like a man -- he had her to thank for a lot of wonderful things.

William went to the desk and punched in Cecily's private cell number, turned on the speaker phone, then waited until she picked up. Buffy made a locking gesture over her mouth, showing that she'd be quiet as a mouse.

"Hello, Cecily," William said, his upper lip curling when he said her name.

"Geoffrey? Did I forget --"

His brow furrowed. "Geoffrey? No, it's William. I'd think that you would know the sound of my voice by now." A mere day ago, the notion that Cecily could be cheating on him would have been devastating. But now it just made him shake his head and want to laugh.

She paused, then said a little shakily, "W-William, why are you calling me? I told you that I'd call you."

"I have something important --"

"I'm at the spa and having a seaweed wrap in five minutes. Honestly, can't whatever it is wait until --"

"Shut your mouth and listen to me for once," William said, his voice deep and commanding.

Cecily was so stunned that she couldn't speak for a few moments. "How... dare you speak to me that way!"

"I'm calling to tell you that I want a divorce."

"Wh-What?"

"You heard me. I've done some serious thinking, and I've come to the obvious conclusion that we're incompatible. I'm tired of the way you've treated me -- the way I've let you treat me -- and I want out."

"Are you drunk?! What's the matter with you?"

"I've completely sober. My lawyers at Wolfram & Hart are drawing up the papers as we speak. They'll be messengered to your parents' home shortly."

"This... This comes as a complete shock!"

"It shouldn't."

"I've only been gone two bloody days! What could have changed?"

"I had a... revelation," William said, turning to smile at Buffy. She smiled back at him, giving him a thumbs-up. "I took off my blinders, and grew a rather large pair of bollocks. I can see our marriage for what it really is now -- a joke."

Cecily tried to think fast, she couldn't lose the status and money that came with the Giles name. She started to sniffle. "William, we can talk about this. We can go to... a marriage counselor if that's what you want. Don't give up on us, darling!"

"What I want is to be divorced from you." He wanted to call her names, he wanted to make it sting as much as he could. But William was basically a sweet-natured man, he would try to keep his tone and words as civil as possible. In a soft voice, he said, "It's the best thing for both of us, Cecily. We have to go our separate ways and find the person that we're meant to be with."

Her crocodile tears dried up fast and her voice grew cold again, "Oh, I think I know what's going on... that blonde whore paid you a visit, did she? I knew someone had to be pulling your strings, and then some."

William and Buffy looked at each other, eyes rounded. How could Cecily even suspect that something had happened between them? They'd only admitted how they truly felt to each other this morning, and they'd never let on that they'd had the hots for each other, particularly not to Cecily.

"I... don't know what you're talking about," William said, taken aback.

"Don't play dumb, though you do it so well. Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about. Damn it all! I should have known I couldn't trust Buffy! That stupid little bitch can't --"

"Leave her out of this, and do NOT speak about her that way," he struggled to keep his voice steady.

"Don't give me orders, William. I'll talk about that white-trash slut any way I choose."

Buffy had to press her lips tightly together to avoid yelling an insult.

His voice rose, "I said don't talk about Buffy that way! She's easily ten times the woman -- and human being -- that you are. It's her that I want to be with and I won't stand for --"

"Bloody hell!" Cecily blurted out. "You were with my cousin?!"

"Isn't... that what you were talking about?" he asked.

"I meant that slutty secretary from the foundation! Oh my God!"

William and Buffy both winced. Buffy felt so stupid -- she'd forgotten all about that Harmony woman that Cecily had been worried about. And now the beans were officially spilled.

"How long has this been going on?!" Cecily demanded.

William was confused, but pressed on. "I've only just realized how much I love Buffy. I wish I would've left you at the bloody altar for her instead of enduring two years of hell!"

"She's there right now, isn't she?" Cecily said with a snarl. "Is she on her knees attending to you to make you do this?"

"She's not..." William took a breath. "Buffy's here, but she isn't doing anything to make me say what I'm saying. Divorcing you was my idea. I am capable of making decisions all by myself, contrary to what you may believe."

Buffy couldn't hold her tongue anymore. "I'm not making William do anything, what he's saying is all him. You've had this coming for a long time, Cecily, and you know it. Karma finally came back around to bite you on the ass."

"How could you, Buffy?! I should have known you were the sort of woman who'd steal husbands from her own family members."

"I'm not that kind of person under normal circumstances," Buffy said defensively.

"Oh, please! You're nothing but a trashy, vulgar slut. Just like your mother," Cecily spat, they could practically see the smug smile on her face. She knew that would upset Buffy.

Buffy balled up her fists and grit her teeth, hopping up from the couch. She didn't let anybody get away with insulting her mother. "Ooo-hoo, do you have the guts to say that to my face, you warthog from Hell?! I'm going to kick your --"

"Truth hurts, doesn't it, Buffy?" Cecily teased. "You always were beneath me, and now you're trying to take away my husband because you're insanely jealous of me."

"The only thing I've ever been jealous of you about is that you had William. It confused the hell out of me because you're a huge bitch, and I couldn't figure out how you made him fall for you. How many times have you complained about him to me?" Buffy ranted. "How many times did I tell you what a great guy he was and that you had to treat him better? Maybe thousands! You didn't appreciate him or deserve him."

"She's just after your money, William, I hope you know that! No woman could want you for anything else. You're a weak, spineless --"

Buffy interrupted, yelling at the speaker phone, "You foul bitch! Don't you talk about him like --"

"Buffy, please," William said, stepping in front of her and putting his hands lightly on her shoulders. "Don't let her get to you. Don't give her the satisfaction, pet."

Buffy bit her lip and took a deep breath through her nose, then nodded. "You're right. I'll let you handle the rest of this alone, baby," Buffy made sure to say the 'baby' extra sweet for Cecily's listening pleasure. She gave William a kiss, then went to wait outside the study. Buffy didn't trust herself not to get into another shouting match with her cousin, and William didn't need them screaming at each other while he tried to get out everything he had to say -- it was already too much like an episode of the Jerry Springer Show.

Cecily was gnashing her teeth, hating this on so many levels. She was losing her ticket to the sweet life, and she was losing him to her dim-witted, slutty cousin. "Well now, maybe with the Puppetmaster out of the room, you can come back to your senses."

William took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes. "Leaving you is coming to my senses. I actually understand why it might be hard for you to believe that I'm saying these things without anyone's influence, because I have been a weakling as far as you were concerned. But I'm a new man, one who doesn't take any shit, especially not from you."

"I'm going to make the both of you very sorry, count on that! And I'm going to tell everyone what that whore did!"

"You want to make yourself out to be the victim?" William asked. "You were awful to me throughout our marriage, Cecily. I'm confident that I can find witnesses that would attest to the fact that you've treated me like shit for years. You want to drag both of us through a long and painful divorce? Then go right ahead, do your worst. You know, Wolfram & Hart are frightfully good at what they do, I'm sure they can make a case for emotional abuse."

She snorted, and said mockingly, "Oh, you poor abused little thing. It's not my fault you were never man enough for me. You were hardly a man at all."

William laughed, surprising her. "That kind of insult might have hurt a few days ago, but I discovered that it was you who had the inadequacies, not me. You're a heartless bitch, why was I even trying to be civil or fair to you? Too bloody nice for my own good. You're very lucky that I'm gracious enough to offer you the settlement I did. You can have the house on the Riviera and $100,000, but that's it. Don't bother coming back to the house in Sunnydale either, that's mine. I'll have your possessions boxed up, you can send someone 'round in a few days to collect them. But don't bother coming here yourself, you aren't allowed on the property and will be promptly removed."

She was quiet, irate and shocked beyond belief. "You can't keep me out of my own house!"

"That's where you're wrong. The house is in my name only, therefore, mine. I may end up selling it and buy something new for a fresh start, but I'm keeping it for now. I might even let you have the furnishings as well, I don't fancy having anything that reminds me of you."

"You son of a bitch! I swear I'll make you pay for this! I'll take you for everything you own!"

"You really are a colossal bitch. Unless you have a major personality adjustment, you're going to die alone and bitter. I don't think you'll get much money, aren't you forgetting about the pre-nup?" William's father had made a prenuptial agreement a requirement before giving his reluctant blessing to their marriage. William had objected strongly to it at the time, but now he was so relieved that his father had been thinking and looking out for his best interests all along when William had been too starry-eyed to see Cecily for who and what she really was.

"Pre-nup or no pre-nup, my lawyers are going to crucify you!"

"We shall see. Regardless of what happens, I'll still have Buffy."

She laughed shrilly. "You really think she'll stay with you? She'll leave you for one of those dumb, hulking brutes she likes so much -- and I'll be watching, pointing and laughing!"

"You can take your opinions and what's left of our marriage, roll them up tight, and shove them straight up your ass. Oh, and go fuck yourself. I'll see you in court. Goodbye, Cecily," William said the last words with utter finality. He wasn't deluding himself that he'd never have to talk to her again. There were going to be meetings with her and her lawyers, but on a personal level, he was done with her.

Cecily was spluttering, trying to say something else, when he pushed the button to hang up the phone.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Buffy poked her head back into the room. She'd heard everything and was so proud of William for being able to talk to Cecily the way he did. If only he'd been that strong and direct from the beginning, but better late than never.

William didn't notice her for a few seconds. Finally telling his wife off for how she'd treated him, finally acting like a man, was practically orgasmic. Those words and emotions had been bottled up inside of him for so long. He felt free.

Then he noticed Buffy in the doorway, smiled and waved her into the room. Buffy hurried over to him, and they wrapped their arms around each other.

"Wow, you really told her off! I'm glad I stepped outside because I had to laugh at how she got all sputtery and shocked. And I probably couldn't have kept my mouth shut."

"I did okay then?" he asked.

"You did great, baby." Buffy kissed him deeply. "I'm sorry that I got into it with her..."

"It's okay. I just wish she hadn't upset you."

Buffy frowned. "Well, I found out her real opinion about me today too. It's pretty much what I figured, but I still wanted to kick her ass. It's a good thing I don't give a flyin' fuck what El Diablo thinks of me."

"I really enjoyed telling her those things," William admitted with a smirk. "Almost better than sex... almost."

Buffy giggled. "Oh yeah? Maybe we'd better do it again just so you can be sure."

"Better do this first." William went back to the phone and took it off the hook. "Don't want a certain pest deluging us with phone calls. Though I expect she'll be calling her lawyers, bankers, and credit card companies to see just how bad off she is."

"Those are the calls you made before?"

William smirked, nodding. "I called my father first, I knew he'd be thrilled, and he was. He actually 'whooped' for joy. Dad's always hated Cecily, so he was more than happy to help me take care of everything. I really owe him for his foresight, he knew that she was no good for me from the beginning. I've got hundreds of I told you so's coming my way, but it'll be worth it."

"Did you tell him about me?" Buffy asked with a smile. She didn't expect him to start telling people about 'them' yet, but had to ask.

"As a matter of fact, I did. I didn't tell him, um, any details, of course, but I did tell him that I was in love with you. Dad likes you."

Her grin expanded. "He does?"

William nodded, "Mmmhmm. He said, 'Buffy's a lovely girl, and seems so pleasant. Are you sure that her and Cecily are really related?'"

They chuckled.

"I've wondered that myself." Buffy put her arms around his waist. "That was weird, how she thought you were someone else at first. You think she's cheating on you with this Geoffrey guy? I'm surprised that it's not a woman."

William shrugged. "I'd swear on a stack of Bibles that she hates sex. But whatever she's doing with him, I get the impression that it's something shady that she doesn't want me knowing about."

"Oh my God, I can't believe I forgot about that Harmony woman," Buffy groaned, putting her forehead against his chest.

William kissed the top of her head and held her. "The damage is done now. I'm glad it turned out like this though."

"Huh?"

"As fun as sneaking around and wearing disguises sounded, I'm relieved that I won't have to hide how much I love you."

"But what if she is able to get like half your money because you cheated on her with me?"

"It does upset me that she would be getting money she doesn't deserve, but I'd give anything to be with you, Buffy. I don't need the money, but I do need you."

She smiled and kissed him. "You're so damn sweet, you big ol' sack of sugar, you. But I don't want that bitch taking you to the cleaners."

He shook his head. "I really don't see that happening, pet. You heard about the pre-nup?" Buffy nodded. "My father insisted on me having one. 'Grateful' doesn't begin to describe how I feel about it now."

“So, what’s the story with this Harmony girl that had Cecily worried? Was she hot for your bod? Do I have some competition?” She slid a hand onto his butt and squeezed.

“If Harmony flirted with me, it wasn’t any different than how she behaved with the other men she crossed paths with. She seemed sweet and was pretty, but the girl isn’t... well, she’s not very bright. And she never seems to stop talking.”

“Hmm, you didn’t even think about chasing her around the desk or pinching her butt?” Buffy teased, giving his butt a pinch.

William shook his head and laughed. "Harmony's not my type. Cecily was actually worried?"

"Yeah, she..." Buffy stopped and bit her lip.

"She what?"

"Well... she kind of called me before she left for England and asked me to... keep an eye on you. That's why Cecily brought up my name when she mentioned 'the blonde whore'."

William cocked an eyebrow. "Oh? I wondered about that. I was hoping she hadn't developed some sort of eerie psychic powers."

"And I said that I would keep an eye on you, just to make her shut up. The truth is... that I didn't like the thought of you fooling around with some other woman either. I was jealous and afraid that you'd run off with someone else before I could tell you how I felt about you. So, I decided after I talked to Cecily that I would come to see you and... Well, you know what happened."

"You planned on seducing me all along?"

Buffy wasn't sure how he was taking her little confession. His face only showed curiosity, but he'd stopped rubbing her back, she didn't like that. "Are you pissed?"

William broke into a smile and laughed. "Why would I be mad? It's flattering. And you were jealous? That is so adorable." He nibbled on her lower lip.

Buffy smiled and put a hand on the back of his neck and kissed him; she absolutely loved kissing him and could do it all day. "I'm glad you find it amusing. I really am relieved that you're not pissed that I had an agenda. Although, I did almost chicken out a few times."

"Not mad in the least, pet. I can't complain about how it turned out. I realized who my dream girl really was, and got to make love to her in many different positions for hours and hours. I couldn't be happier than I am right now."

"I couldn't be happier either, William. We owe some thanks to Joan Jett." Buffy giggled.

He gave her a questioning smile and raised an eyebrow.

Buffy explained, still giggling. "I was singing along with that song 'Do You Wanna Touch Me' before I came over yesterday, and it ran through my mind again right before I pounced on you. It gave me the courage to act like a giant ho."

William chuckled. "I'll definitely have to listen to that song sometime then. I wonder if Miss Jett would mind terribly if I wrote her a thank you note?"

Buffy laughed harder. "I think I will too!"

They both felt giddy. They were in love with someone who loved them back, William was on his way to being rid of the bitch monster from Hell, and their bodies were beginning to tingle and heat up in anticipation of more naked fun.

Buffy wanted to say something important before they got down and dirty again, she'd probably forget if she didn't say it now. "I want to be perfectly clear on one thing about our relationship," she said seriously.

"What is it?" William asked a little anxiously.

"If you don't like something I do or say, you call me on it. I want you to speak your mind about anything and everything. I want our relationship to be the complete opposite of what you had with her. We're partners, on equal footing."

He smiled and kissed the tip of her nose. "Alright, I can do that. I'd hate to argue with you, but I promise that I won't keep quiet if there's something bothering me. I'm enjoying my brand-new pair of bollocks, and will use them."

Buffy giggled. "You won't mind if I 'use' them from time to time? I enjoy playing with them."

"I heartily encourage that."

"Ya know, there's one good thing about arguing."

"There is?"

"Mmmhmm, make up sex."

"Oh! I've heard of that, but never had it before. Good, is it?"

"It's one of the big perks of long-term relationships. But it's hard for me to imagine our sex getting stale. It was so fucking hot."

William kissed along her jaw. "I'm so excited, a whole new world has opened up to me. All because of you, Buffy. I feel like I was a virgin before last night -- which isn't too far from the truth."

Buffy winced. "Was she your first?"

He sighed and nodded.

"Oh, baby, I'm sorry." Buffy kissed him. "But it does make how amazing you are in bed all the more impressive."

"I thought sex was completely overrated." He laughed. "It was bloody horrible. But then, a sexy little thing jumped me and turned me around on the subject. Now, I love shagging."

"Mmmm, and you do it so well. I'm gonna shag you in every room of this house." She giggled as a naughty thought occurred to her. "Want to start by shagging on Cecily's bed? We'd be exorcising demons from the house."

William laughed. "Why not! That poor unfortunate bed should see at least one good shag before being dismantled and shipped to her. And we do need to get rid of the demons."

For now, they pushed aside any unease or troubled thoughts about Cecily and what she might do to fight the divorce. It didn't matter what his ex tried to do, the two of them were together, and that's all that mattered.

This time, William did sweep Buffy up into his arms 'Gone With the Wind' style, and carried her upstairs to exorcise those pesky demons.





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