What's happening? Why do my lungs hurt? Why is the air so cold? My skin feels hot. So hot.

The cold air is hurting my lungs. Why?

What's that sound? It's so loud.

Where am I? Who are all these people around me? Am I dead? Am I dust? What am I?

What was I?

Where's Buffy? I need Buffy.

Why can't I talk? Why does the air hurt? Is it going into my lungs? How? Why? It's stabbing me. Like razors cutting me open.

Am I dead?

Buffy?

Help me.

My skin is hot.

Who's hitting my chest?

Someone is grabbing me. Hands on me. Cold hands. Ice cold.

God, what's happening to me?

Spike was half dreaming. He was inside the Hellmouth. The First was torturing him. It looked like Buffy. It told him lies. Then it looked like Drusilla. It lied more. His head was under water. He couldn't drown. He could only be played with. He knew Buffy would come for him.

He drifted to another memory. Fred. She told him he was worth saving. He stood in Angel's office. He saw Wesley, Gunn, Angel, and Fred. They were staring at him.

What?

Fred morphed into Illyria. She approached Spike, head half cocked. She sniffed him and with a face of disgust, she sneered. "You will stink like the rest of them now."

He closed his eyes. When he opened them his found himself chained in Buffy's basement. She was standing in front of him.

"I believe in you."

Spike was suddenly in the Hellmouth again. He was burning. He saw Buffy run away. She just told him she loved him.

"School's out for bloody summer."

Then darkness.

They gathered back at the hotel. It was pretty empty now. The dragon scare chased away the guests and workers. Buffy and Angel came through the lobby carrying a half conscious Spike .They laid Spike down on one of the couches near the fireplace.

Willow, Issa and Xander burst through the stairwell door. Kennedy ran to Willow and greeted her with a hug and kiss. Giles looked around to make sure everyone was accounted for then narrowed his eyes on Spike.

"Spike, can you hear me?" Buffy rested her hand on his chest. She felt a vibration under it and yanked her hand away. What was that?

"The Shanshu. He fulfilled it. He's alive Buffy," Angel said. "I think."

Buffy looked up at Angel, then back down to Spike. Alive? How? "That shu-mai thingy you used to talk about? I thought that was written for you," she reminded Angel.

"A vampire with a soul." Giles interrupted. "Could have been either of you. Why not you?" he asked Angel.

Angel didn't want to answer. But they deserved to know. "The Circle of The Black Thorn made me sign my chance away. I did it to prove to them I didn't care about it. That I was on their side." Angel was a bit embarrassed.

Buffy stared at Spike the whole time. He was coming to. She placed her hand again to his chest. There was a steady beat under it. His heart, beating. She swallowed hard. She felt a hand rest on hers. It was warm, soothing. She looked. It was Spike's.

Their eyes met and he smiled. She smiled back. "Hey," she whispered. She wasn't sure if he knew what was happening to him.

"Hey," he said back, squeezing her hand. "What's that loud thumping?"

Thumping? Oh.

"You're heart. It's... " Buffy turned to Angel. Did Angel tell Spike about this prophecy?

"So I Shanshued after all?" he asked. "No mountain dew, huh Angel?" Spike joked.

Angel smiled. "Yea, no mountain dew"

Buffy helped Spike up. He sat on the couch staring at the fire. It flickered about, mesmerizing him. Buffy watched him get lost in the scene. He appeared to be... Spike, but calmer, more serene. Buffy's own heart skipped when Spike turned his gaze to her. Their eyes met. Buffy could see the difference now. He was different. Now, not only did he have a soul, he was a living, breathing... man. She wanted to cry or laugh, or she didn't know. She wasn't sure what she was feeling.

Giles approached them, concerned. "Spike, how do you feel?" he asked.

Spike ran his hands down his torso. It was nice being under a blanket. He felt warm. He felt...

"Great, actually," Spike grinned.

Xander and Issa joined Buffy at the fireplace. "Well, Spike, at least you lost that pasty glow" Xander joked.

They chuckled. Xander continued, "So, what's the plan now. Where do we go?"

"We should stay put for now." Giles suggested. "There's no sense relocating. Not until we know what more awaits us."

Dawn joined them, holding a can of soda she purchased from the ending machine. Noticing the silence, she eyed them suspiciously. "Why is everyone so quiet? What's up?"

Spike stared again at the fire, silent. Buffy watched him, now a little worried about his calmness. Spike was never this... daydreamy.

Andrew yawned turning to Spike. "So, Spike. Now that you've shu-mai'd, does that mean you lost all your super powers?"

Giles mumbled "Shanshu"

Dawn was confused. "What? What happened?"

Robin chimed in. "Spike is human now. It's some prophecy thing. He isn't a vampire anymore."

"ummm, HU?" Dawn looked at Spike. He didn't seem any different to her.

Suddenly, Spike rose from the couch and turned to Andrew. "Ya know. I have no idea."

"Spike, why don't we test it. Hit me," Buffy demanded.

Spike looked at her like she was crazy, but then again, it made sense. She was strong enough so if he still had super powers, he wouldn't hurt her, that much.

He pulled his arm back and swung a punch. Instead of punching her, he hit Angel. Angel went flying into the other couch and fell over.

"Well, safe to say..." Buffy said

"Can someone explain to me what's going on?" Dawn pleaded.

Andrew approached her and made a gesture for her to sit down. "Sit down, my friend and I will tell you the story of the Shu... shan ...um"

Giles was annoyed at this point. "Dawn, let me explain,"

Angel rose and rubbed his jaw, them mumbled something to himself as he walked over to the reception desk.

Buffy giggled. "He'll get over it."

"Hey, Angel!" Spike yelled. Angel made a 'hold on" gesture then turned his back to him.

Giles continued. "You see Dawn, there is an ancient prophecy called the Shanshu where it states that a 'vampire with a soul' will play a pivotal role in the apocalypse. He will be rewarded with a human life."

"So, you fulfilled this prophecy, became human, but with super strength. Kinda like us now, huh Spike." Faith said.

Andrew held up his hand as if in class. "Yes, Andrew?" Giles asked.

"Well, what do we know about this shumai.. I mean Shanshu business? Do we know for sure that Spike is okay?"

"Yea, the Samsung Prophecy should have more info. Right?" Xander asked.

"How did anyone even know about the Cashew...?" Dawn asked.

Giles, now utterly annoyed, interrupted. "Okay, now I think you lot are mispronouncing it on purpose."

Buffy's eyes widened and her stomach flipped. They had a good point. What did we know about this? She turned to Angel who was still on the phone. She watched him hangup and then turn to join them. Buffy jumped to meet him.

"Angel, what more do we know of this prophecy. Is Spike going to be..."

"He'll be fine. I think," Angel answered. " I don't think the prophecy spoke of the hereafter. It just mentioned that..."

"Angel, what of the powers I obviously still possess?" Spike interrupted.

Angel was just as confused as they were. He really didn't have the answers for them. Too bad Wesley... "I...we can investigate it, later."

Spike grumbled. "Fine. I really need to change. These pajamas are hideous!"

Buffy and Dawn giggled together. "I like them Spike! They're very... human," Dawn joked. She looked at Buffy and they both burst into laughter.

Spike growled. "Damn Summers girls!"


Spike filled the bathtub, stripped off his clothes then sat in the warm soapy water. It covered his body like a warm blanket. His head rolled back and he sighed. His skin felt so different. He was living, breathing. He can feel his pours open when the heat of the water enveloped him. His heart was the most impressive. Beating, loudly. He can feel his pulses. It had been so long since he felt it. It had been a lifetime or more since his heart beat. He read that prophecy over and over a few months back, but never really understood how it worked. It was strange that he became human just like that. One dragon down and viola, he is living and breathing. Spike was sure there was a lot more to it, but a huge part of him didn't care. Something inside his now beating heart comforted him in knowing this was his destiny. All along. This is probably why he was brought back from the amulet. That Sunnydale battle was the first trial. No. Getting his soul was his first trial. Or maybe it started even before that. Either way, this was what he was meant for. Humanity.

And her.

He zoned out until Buffy got his attention. Buffy was fumbling through the towels next to the sink. She was already bathed and in a robe. She wasn't sure how to react with Spike. She wanted to be close to him, yet she couldn't just jump back into his arms like nothing happened. The Shanshu scared her and for good reason. Nothing came that easy to anyone. Especially to any of them. Prophecies can be changed and broken as well. She is a living example of that.

"Spike," she said without looking at him, "Are you... worried about this prophecy thingy? We don't know much about it."

"I'm a bit curious. But no use fretting about it. I wanted this. I almost killed Angel for it a while back," he told her with his eyes still closed.

Buffy stopped and turned to Spike. "Huh?"

"We were set up to think that all we had to do was drink from the magical cup filled with mountain dew an' poof , we'd be all with the living again. Didn't quite work out." Spike shrugged at the memory. He and Angel fought hard that day. He knew it wasn't all about the cup or the prophecy. There was so much bad blood between them, a fight like that was bound to happen. A lot was said that day and a lot of blood was shed. Now they are better men for it. Spike lifted his arm to wash his neck but winced in pain.

"Here, let me" Buffy sat on the edge of the bath tub and gently washed Spike's neck and back. She eased carefully over his wounds, noticing him tense up when she brushed near them. As she moved down his back, she heard him breathing heavier. This caused their eyes to lock. His eyes sparkled. He was so full of life. It was strange seeing him this way. His skin even looked like it was glowing.

She released the wash cloth and ran her fingers across his shoulders. She was so anxious to feel his skin. To feel the warmth. At this point, she didn't care about anything else. Her passion for him was always strong and it guided her actions. Her fingers lingered towards his chest and as she placed her hand down she felt his heart speed up it's rhythm. A wave a heat ran through her body. Spike grabbed her hand and squeezed. Her stomach was on fire as she felt her own heart speed up.

"Buffy," Spike whispered. He leaned in to kiss her. She met him. Their lips touched gently. The heat from his mouth was exciting her to the point of no return. She let his hand run down her body to her back. His touch was amazing. She could tell he was nervous but his body told her otherwise. He grabbed hold of her arms and pulled her closer to him. She gently straddled him, now with her legs in the water. He brought his mouth to her neck and kissed it gently.

Buffy was on fire. Her body melted into his. She felt him pause. He lifted from her neck, then looked deeply into her eyes and smiled. "My heart is beating out of control," he told her.

She smiled. "Mine too."

They kissed again. Harder this time. Spike ran his hands up her thighs, moving the fabric of her wet robe aside. He slid his fingers back down and loosened the belt of her robe. He opened it a bit and stared down at her bare breasts. Spike smiled at that sight. He ran his fingers over her skin. Buffy arched her back, then grabbed him closer. The feel of his warm skin on hers sent shock waves through her body. She pulled away, helping him remove her robe.
Spike loved watching her. He felt sweat bead up on his forehead. He pulled her in close to him and kissed her hard. He untied her robe and slipped it off. His hands slid down her back to her backside. She continued to keep her lips locked to his. She moved her body in rhythm with his, causing the water to spill out the sides of the tub. He turned her face to his and kissed her passionately. His hands moving gently over her cuts, noticing she had a lot of them. He held her tight and lifted themselves out of the tub. With her legs wrapped around him, he carried her to the bed. They fell back, kissing passionately. He put his arm behind her back and rested himself between her legs pressing his body against hers. Buffy felt his warmth a lot more now without the water around them. His heat was so amazing to her. She felt his heart beating hard against her own.

Everything about this moment seemed unreal. Here she was, with Spike who, up until yesterday, she thought was dead. And now, not only is he alive, but he's human. She kissed his cheek, then lightly brushed her lips to his ear. "Spike..."


Buffy rested her head on Spike's chest as his fingers played with her hair. It seemed like the entire building was asleep. He revelled in this moment. The sun was beaming through the windows and he wanted it to shine in his face. He hadn't felt the sun since the day he wore the gem of Amara. He looked down at a sleeping Buffy. He didn't want to wake her. She slept so peacefully. This moment, he never saw coming. He thought he was going to die again, last night. Then here she comes, with her army to help them. Now he's a living breathing man. The woman of his dreams sleeping in his arms after a morning of love making.

"Amazing," he said to himself.

Buffy stirred a bit, then rolled over to her other side. Spike kissed her shoulder as he rose from the bed. He should really sleep but he couldn't. He wanted to bask in the sun. Thoughts of the nights events stayed with him. He was alive. Human, but strong.

How can this be? Who would know more about the prophecy?

He hoped Angel would have more answers for him. There was no going back to Wolfram and Hart, not that the building would still be there. He searched the room for some clothes of some sort. His duster and jeans were still laying on the floor, but they looked spent. All he found was another pair of pajamas. These would have to do until he went down to the hotel shop and snagged some normal clothes. He slid his feet into a pair of slippers next to the bed.

Ahh.

They felt soft and warm. He bent over and kissed Buffy on the head. She stirred and mumbled something incoherent. He smiled and walked to the door.

The hallway was empty. There was nothing but silence throughout the building. Spike made his way to the elevator. He pressed the down button and waited. The door finally chimed and opened for him. The ride down was too silent. This quiet was starting to get to him. He reached the ground level and stepped out of the elevator. He spotted the shop.

"A-Ha, clothes!" he said aloud. He picked out a pair of blue jeans and a green tee shirt that said 'I love L.A.' He smirked at the irony. He found some boxers, socks and a pair of tennis shoes. He was stripping out of his pajamas when he heard someone walking. Without thinking, a naked Spike crept through the shop. He spotted a golf club and grabbed it. The sound of footsteps grew closer. He backed up against the wall waiting, golf club over head. His heart was beating fast and hard. He thought it was so loud, this intruder must of heard it. The footsteps entered the shop and stopped. Spike jumped out and into position to strike the intruder.

"Hey. Spike! What the..," Angel growled.

Spike sighed then let down his guard. "Bloody hell Angel. Why are you sneakin' about?"

Angel eyed Spike up and down and smiled. "Shouldn't I be asking you the same thing?" Angel joked.

Spike looked down at his nakedness. He quickly made his way back over to the pile of new duds he picked out and dressed himself.

Angel, with his back turned began talking to him. "Spike. I'm glad I bumped into you. I mean, minus the naked part." Angel was hiding his laughter.

Spike was clumsily putting on his socks and shoes. He kept falling over and cursing to himself. Angel stopped and turned to Spike with a frown.

"So you and Buffy, you two are... sharing a room?" Angel accused.

Spike wasn't sure he really felt like going there with Angel right now. He was still high from his moment with Buffy. He didn't want to come down.

"Angel, back to why you're so glad to see me..."

"Okay, Spike. I wanted to find out more info on this Shanshu prophecy. There's a certain someone from Wolfram and Hart that may be useful."

"Who could possibly help from there?" Spike moved closer to Angel.

"Eve." Angel answered, sheepishly.

"Eve?" Spike asked.

Angel nodded.

"Angel wasn't she partly responsible for our opera house mountain dew excursion? What makes you think...?" Spike argued.

"She has nothing left. Lindsey is dead. Wolfram and Hart don't want her." Angel had certainty in his eyes.

"So this is who called you earlier, was it?" Spike asked.

"She's going to come meet us. Later. I wanted to make sure you'll be around to meet with her. That is unless..."

"Angel, I'll be here. I'm the one this happened to, remember?"

"It's our only hope to find out more about it, Spike." Angel defended.

Spike nodded at him to say thanks. As he exited the shop Angel followed him. "She loves you, ya know," Angel declared. Spike stood in his tracks and looked back at Angel. Angel didn't look mad, or upset.

"Spike. I, I saw you two. I know. I know Buffy. When she told me back in Sunnydale that you were in her heart, I didn't know to what extent. But seeing you two... well, now I know."

Spike was stunned. She told him that? Last year? Spike pressed his lips together and gave Angel a slight nod and smile. Then walked off.

This was definitely a day of revelations

Spike slipped out of his new duds and back into bed with Buffy. The sun can wait. He had all the sunshine he needed right next to him. After what Angel had just told him, he felt even closer to her. He was a git for saying what he said during those last moments together. Spike felt her love now. He couldn't deny that. It was interesting that she told Angel how she felt before she even told him. Spike understood now why she was so mad at him before. She probably went through this whole year thinking he never knew how she really felt about him. Spike felt like a royal screw up. When they spent that last night together back in Sunnydale, he thought he saw something in her eyes. Fear is what told him it couldn't have been love. They sat for hours and talked, laughed, held each other. Yet, he refused to believe she loved him. After that horrible day when he tried to force himself on her, he shuddered at the thought of convincing himself of her love. She rolled over and wrapped her arm around him. He caressed it gently.

"My love," he whispered, then drifted off with her








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