Chapter 8



"Xander, did you hear me?"



Xander finally looked up when Willow tapped him on the arm and he shook his head before straightening in his seat. "I don't get it."



"Get what?" Willow asked him confusedly.



"Buffy," Xander answered her. "I mean, we are always here for her. We've fought by her side since high school. We're her friends."



"Yeah," Willow said slowly, not understanding what he was talking about.



Anya rolled her eyes before stalking over to the table where the others were. "He's on his Buffy and Spike train again," she told them. "He thinks Buffy and Spike have something going on."



"Going on?" Giles asked.



"Yeah, you know, orgasm buddies," Anya smiled brightly.



Gasp and coughs and giggles were heard as Giles, Willow and Dawn shared different reactions to Anya's blunt assessment of the situation. "And what exactly is your basis for this?" Giles was the first to recover from the announcement.



"I saw them," Xander said angrily. "At the Bronze. They were in the corner making out like teenagers. It was - disgusting!" He said with a shudder.



Dawn grinned before ducking her head. She knew all about what happened and had sworn her secrecy in the matter.



"Are you sure?" Willow asked before she slowly took a seat.



"Yes I'm sure!"



Xander watched all their reactions before sighing heavily when no one spoke. "So, what are we going to do about it?"



"Well, I'm not sure," Giles said. "Buffy is an adult."



"Please," Xander practically yelled. "We know what happened with Angel."



"Spike is nothing like Angel," Dawn cut in hastily.



"Exactly! He's worse," Xander spat out. "We can't allow her to..."



"Allow her?" Dawn asked with wide eyes. "She doesn't need our permission to do anything."



"No, but she's clearly messed up. She hasn't acted right since that stupid spell. She came back wrong!"



Dawn shook her head and bit her lip to keep from saying anything. She knew if she were mad enough, she'd spill all of Buffy's secrets and that wasn't something she wanted to do. Sitting back in her chair, she decided a little cold, hard stare at Xander would do just as good.





~*~*~*~*~






Buffy walked slowly up the steps to her house and smiled as she looked back at Spike while he crossed the street. She wished he would have accepted her invitation to come inside. He insisted that her friends would eventually catch on if things got too cozy too fast between them and he was probably right. She knew he wouldn't go far though. He still found the need to sit under her tree at night and watch over her as she slept. He denied doing it, but she had seen the red glow from his cigarettes on too many nights and no matter how many times she told him it wasn't necessary, she would always see him there.



Sighing lightly, Buffy opened the door and came face to face with all her friends. "Uh, hi guys. Something wrong?"



"You can say that again," Xander sneered.



"Xander," Willow warned. "You promised."



"Okay, did I miss something?" Buffy asked before slowly walking into the living room. She gave a small glance and saw her sister mouth "sorry" before she turned and looked at the others. "What's going on?"



"Buffy, we're sorry to barge in on you so late, but Xander has some concerns," Giles said with a tiny smile.



"Okay," Buffy smiled lightly. "What kind of concerns?" She asked already knowing what this was about. Good thing Spike didn't stay she thought to herself.



"It's about Spike," Giles told her. "Xander seems to think you two are...involved."



"Involved?" Buffy asked trying to figure out exactly what they thought was going on.



"Yes, as in romantically," Giles clarified for her.



Buffy gave a small laugh. She didn't know if it was the fear of being caught or the ridiculousness of having to explain anything to her friends that had her shaking her head and saying the first thing that popped into her head. "That's insane! Why would I be.anything with Spike?"



Dawn sat there and listened. The more she heard the madder she became. She knew Buffy's reaction was just her normal defense mechanism, but it wasn't fair to Spike. He deserved more than that. Hearing Buffy agree with the gang's assessment that Spike was an evil monster had her biting her tongue before she got up from her seat. She glared hard at her sister before stomping out of the room and up the stairs.



Buffy couldn't even look at Dawn as she stomped by her. Buffy watched as the others seemed to all talk at once. She didn't know why she couldn't just tell them how she felt or how much she really enjoyed Spike's company. She sat back in her seat and listened to her friends explain "why" Spike wasn't a suitable boyfriend. She leaned her head back against the chair before sighing heavily and looking out the window. Her heart nearly stopped when her eyes met Spike's and the look on his face nearly broke her heart.



She stared at him until he turned and walked away and as much as she wanted to go to him and tell him she didn't mean what she had said, she knew her friends would eat her alive if she did.



Spike walked slowly across the yard before stepping out onto the sidewalk. He stopped and pulled his smokes from his coat pocket, lighting one before taking a long drag. He closed his eyes and exhaled before he crossed the street.



He shook his head and laughed lightly as he thought about it. What did he really expect from her? Did he honestly think she'd tell her friends about them? He knew that answer to that before the thought even had time too fully surface. She'd never tell her friends about them and he had tried to tell himself that it didn't matter. That just knowing she cared for him was enough. He now knew it wasn't. He wanted more. He wanted whatever it was between them to be out in the open.



Remembering the look on her face while she denied the accusations her friends threw at her, Spike knew that would never happen. He would always be the one thing she hid away from the rest of the world. He was her dirty little secret and in the shadows is where he would stay.





~*~*~*~*~






Buffy took a deep breath as she stood outside of the crypt door. She had spent the whole night after the gang left and most of today trying to figure out what she was going to say to Spike. The look on his face when she saw him standing at the window caused her eyes to close in an attempt to drown out the painful image. He had looked more hurt than she had ever seen him. Causing Spike pain wasn't something she would have cared about doing several weeks ago, now it hurt her just as much as it did him.



Knocking softly on the door, Buffy put a smile on her face before pushing the heavy door open. She could smell candle wax as she entered and the dancing flames that shadowed across the crypt walls made the inside look almost homey.



She had never really paid much attention to Spike's crypt, but as she finally took the time to look at it, she realized it wasn't that bad. Well, for a tomb, that is.



"Spike, are you here?" Buffy called out before walking to the trap door and looking down when she didn't get an answer. "Spike?"



Bending down, Buffy made her way down into the lower chamber. There was a faint glow of candlelight flickering against the stone walls and even though she had only been this far inside Spike's crypt once, she found herself slightly excited as she jumped from the bottom of the ladder.



She walked slowly, looking into the darkened corners before turning the corner. She froze when she saw what lie there.ÿ She couldn't help but smile as she saw the large four-poster bed up against one wall and the bright rugs that littered the floors. It looked like any other bedroom, except for the occasional coffin jutting out from the stone walls.



"Spike, are you down here?" Buffy walked across the room, taking in the space as she made her way to the bed. She couldn't help but smile as she saw the silk sheets that lay haphazardly across it. She had to admit that the room was quite cozy.



She sat down on the edge of the bed and sighed heavily when she realized he wasn't there. Her eyes scanned the room and her shoulders slumped as she tried to figure out where he had gone. The sun had only set an hour ago and she was sure he would have been waiting for her. He would want an explanation to what she had told her friends. So where was he?





~*~*~*~*~






Spike watched her from the entrance of the tunnels and he cursed himself for hiding from her. He didn't even know why he did. The minute he heard her approach the crypt, he had jumped into the lower level and made a dash for the tunnels.



She was sitting on his bed looking around the room and he smiled when she ran her hands over the silk sheets. He had spent many nights fantasizing about her in his bed and now that she was there, he wanted nothing more than to make himself known. Sighing heavily, Spike leaned his head against the cold stone wall and just watched her. He had wondered all day if she would come and he had thought of everything she might have told him and his reaction to each. Nothing ever brought the satisfying relief he hoped for other than her coming clean to her friends and he knew that would never happen.



Buffy finally stood and made her way to the ladder and Spike watched her walk away, closing his eyes when she was out of sight. He didn't open them until he heard the crypt door close and he finally stepped out of his hiding place.



Maybe he could help them both by trying to get to know the scoobies a little better. A harsh chuckled escaped him when that thought reminded him of how ridiculous the idea was. The scoobies would never accept him. Not in this lifetime or any other.





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