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a/n-annoying Joyce ahead


Her mom just stared at her blankly, her eyes blinking rapidly, than she regarded her daughter with disappointment and sorrow.

“Buffy, I don’t need you to lie to me,” Joyce said quietly, as she stared at this complete stranger before her who she had given birth to.

“I’m not lying!” Buffy exclaimed beyond frustrated. “I mean, come on mom! Wake up and smell the reality! What do crosses and holy water have to do with satanic cults? Huh? Tell me? And stakes? Don’t tell me you haven’t noticed anything weird about this town.”

Denial reared up and tried to shield Joyce from acknowledging the truth. “Every town has their share of bad elements, Buffy. Sunnydale is no different.”

Spike‘s snort broke through the thick tension that was building between the two Summers women. “Joyce, you remember Buffy’s little school function one night few months back?” His head tipped to the side as he regarded Buffy’s mom intently. “I believe it was chalked up to an ‘alleged gang on PCP’ breaking in and messing up your daughter’s pretty little doilies? I even believe there were a few fatalities?”

Denied memories squeezed through and the actual events of that evening played in Joyce’s mind and she nodded warily, watching as Spike reached over to the weapon strewn table and palmed an ax. Her breath hitched slightly when she witnessed his hands running up and down the smooth wooden handle.

“Don’t supposed you remember hitting anyone over the head with one of these babies that night, do you?” Spike asked suddenly, watching her reaction.

Joyce’s eyes widened with delayed recognition. “But… that wasn’t you,” she insisted. “That man had some hideous facial deformity. I think he was like that poor boy in that movie ‘Mask‘ with Cher.” .

Spike kept his eyes locked on Buffy’s mother, finding himself not wanting to scare her but not wanting her to hurt his girl anymore.

He shrugged and remarked sarcastically. “Right. A whole gang of deformed people on PCP. Guess they have something to be pissed about and all. Makes right sense, it does.”


Buffy snorted and reached out to touch her mom’s arm. “Mom, ok, here’s the entire sitch.” She paused to take a deep breath. “Vampires are real and I’m a Vampire Slayer.” At her look on her mom’s face, Buffy rushed to add, “I know it is all kinds of weird, but come on! Look at the facts! I‘m totally telling the truth!”

But her mom refused to believe; Buffy could see it in her eyes, that deep rooted denial. “Buffy, no. I’m sorry. I just can’t accept that.”

Buffy threw up her hands in frustration. “What? You’d rather believe I sacrifice live chickens or something?”

“No, what I WANT is the truth.”

“That IS the truth.”

“I’d like to hear more about this poor man with the obvious facial deformity,” Spike injected, his growing amusement with the whole scenario clearly evident.

Buffy gritted her teeth and sent him an annoyed look. “Sorry Spike, no mocking the afflicted in this house.”

Seeing what a toll this was taking on Buffy‘s emotional well-being, Spike decided it was time to put it to rest, once and for all.

“Bloody hell, Slayer! Just let me show your mum and we can get past this repetitive accusation and denial portion of the evening. Your mum doesn’t want to believe it, but she doesn’t want to believe you’ve been a naughty girl either. Let’s give the poor woman some peace of mind, eh? Got better things to do.”

Buffy knew exactly what those ’better things’ were, but had to agree with Spike. This had gotten old the second they walked through the door. She faced her mom again and tried for a responsible tone since it was obvious somebody had to be the grown up in this conversation and her mother was NOT fit for the role.

“Mom, we’re going to show you something, but I don’t want you to freak, ok?”

“Oh Buffy…” Her mom‘s voice trailed off as she shook her head disappointedly. But at Buffy’s bleak look, Joyce motioned for her to continue.

Buffy shot a nervous look at Spike, who nodded his support. Wringing her hands in front of her nervously, Buffy announced in a quick rush, “Spikeisavampire.”

Her mom shook her head to clear the cobwebs that had obviously garbled the words that she had heard, because there was NO way her daughter had said what she had actually thought she did. “Come again?”

Spike pushed himself away from the table he’d been leaning against. “We’re going to need the facial deformity, I’m afraid.” he told Buffy with mock severity, handing the ax over. “Ok, you’re pretending you are your mum.”

Buffy rolled her eyes. “Don’t tell me, let me guess. You’re the big bad vampire.”

A brilliant smile answered her. “Well, yeah. That’s the reason for this little tableau, innit?”

“Buffy, what is this…”

Buffy shot her mom a glare. “Mom, not another word. You are obviously the seeing is believing person type of person, so remember Back to School night?” At her mom’s nod, Buffy continued, “Well, this is what REALLY happened so watch and believe.”

Joyce nodded mutely at the commanding tone in Buffy’s voice.

“Bossy chit, your daughter.”

“Shut up Spike, and get in position.”

Spike grinned at her bossiness and did as commanded, memories of that night flashing easily through his head where he almost had the death of his third slayer under his belt.

He realized suddenly that he actually owed Joyce a debt of gratitude for nailing him with said ax.

“So anyway, remember when you hit deformed guy with an ax? Well, in actuality, deformed guy was just about to kill me.” Buffy explained, pointing at Spike who had his back to her.

Buffy raised the ax and mimed smashing him on the head with the ax as she said “get the hell away from my daughter.”

Spike fell to the ground theatrically and snarled. Buffy sighed in exasperation. “Spike, this would be a lot more convincing if you actually WERE deformed guy.”

“Oh right.” With a sharp grinding of facial bones, the facial deformity in question slid into place, distorting the upper half of his face.

When he saw the look of absolute terror on Joyce’s face, he quickly shifted back. “Don‘t think that was the best of ideas, pet. Your mum is scared out of her gourd, can hear her heart zipping away from here.”

When Buffy turned to look at her mom and saw fear reflected back, Buffy threw up her arms in aggravation “God, what is it going to take?”

She watched as her mom shakily walked over to the couch and sat down, not allowing herself eye contact with either Spike or Buffy as she downed the rest of her drink.

Finally anger burned its way through Buffy, she’d had enough. Spike could practically see it clawing to get out, her eyes becoming sharp glittering emeralds of rage as she indulged in a staring contest with her mom.

Except her mom refused to meet her eye, instead staring at a random spot on the floor.

When terse minutes of silence passed, Buffy finally stomped over to plant herself in front of her mom, her tightly fisted hands on her hips in righteous tribute.

“Your time for self pity is over, mom, so get over yourself. You demanded the truth, you got the truth. So it wasn’t what you were expecting, I get that. But you know what? My life hasn’t exactly turned out the way I was expecting either. I didn’t ASK for this. I was chosen, told I had a duty to do and I had NO CHOICE.”

“How long?” Her mom’s voice was quiet and withdrawn.

“Almost two years now, since I turned 15. So big troublemaker? Not so much.”

“Are you…evil?”

Buffy’s mouth dropped at that question. Spike stepped in to field that question, his amusement over the question evident. “Your daughter is about as far from evil as you can get. She is the white light, the shining glory, the persona of all things good…”

“And you?” Joyce interrupted Spike’s glowing monologue to regard this man she had tried to flirt with that evening. No, vampire. He was a vampire.

Buffy sighed. “We’ll talk about Spike later, ok? Just trust me for now. He’s not going to hurt anyone.”

When the front door opened, three sets of eyes whipped around. Buffy breathed in a sigh of relief when she saw her dad framed in the door. Her dad was here. This was of the good. Tears pricked her eyes and she exchanged a small smile with Spike.

But then Angel and Xander showed up behind him and her gut clenched.

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